The Practice of Charity towards our Neighbor

Taken from "Preparation for Death" by St Alphonsus de Liguori,

Bishop and Doctor of the Church

He who loves God, loves his neighbor also; but he who loves not his

neighbor, neither does he love God; for the divine precept says,

"That he who loveth God, loves also his brother." (John, iv.) We must

also love our neighbor in heart as well as in deed. And how much are

we to love him? Here is the rule: "Love the Lord thy God with thy

whole soul, . . . And thy neighbor as thyself." (Luke, x.27) We must,

then, love God above all things, and more than ourselves; and our

neighbor as ourselves. So that, as we desire our own good, and take

delight in it when we have it, and, on the contrary, are sorry for

any evil that may happen to us, so also we must desire our neighbor's

good, and rejoice when he obtains it; and, on the other hand, we must

be sorry for his misfortunes. So, again, we must neither judge nor

suspect evil of our neighbor, without good grounds. And this is what

constitutes interior charity.

External charity consists in our words and actions towards our

neighbor. As to words, first we must abstain from the least shadow of

detraction. A detractor is hateful to God and man. On the contrary, he

who speaks well of every one is beloved by God and men; and when the

fault cannot be excused, we must at least excuse the intention.

Secondly, let us be careful not to repeat to any one the evil that

has been said of him by another; because sometimes long enmities and

revenge arise from such things. The Scripture says, he who sows

discord is hated by God. Thirdly, we must take care not to wound our

neighbor, by saying anything that may hurt him; even were it only in

jest. Would you like to be laughed at in the same way as you laugh at

your neighbor? Fourthly, let us avoid disputes; sometimes on account

of a mere trifle quarrels are begun, which end in abuse and rancor.

We have also to guard against the spirit of contradiction, which some

indulge when they gratuitously set themselves to contradict

everything. On such occasions give your opinion, and then be quiet.

Fifthly, let us speak gently to all, even to our inferiors; therefore

let us not make use of imprecations or abuse. And when our neighbor is

angry with us, and is somewhat abusive, let us answer meekly, and the

quarrel will be at an end: "A mild answer breaketh wrath." (Prov.

xv). And when we are annoyed by our neighbor, we must be careful not

to say anything; because our passion will then make us go too far; it

will make us exaggerate; but afterwards we shall certainly be sorry

for it. St. Francis de Sales says, "I was never angry in my life,

that I did not repent of it shortly afterwards." The rule is to be

silent as long as we feel ourselves disturbed. And when our neighbor

continues to be irritated, let us reserve the correction till another

time, even though it should be necessary; because for the moment our

words would not convince, and would do no good.

With regard also to the charity of our actions towards our neighbor:

first, it is practiced by aiding him as we best may. Let us remember

what the Scripture says: "For alms deliver from all sin and from

death, and will not suffer the soul to go into darkness." (Tob. iv.

II). Almsgiving, then, saves us from sin and from hell. By alms is

understood any assistance which it is in our power to render to our

neighbor. The kind of almsgiving which is the most meritorious is to

help the soul of our neighbor, by correcting him gently and

opportunely, whenever we can. And let not us say with some, "What

doth it signify to me?" It does signify to one who is a Christian. He

who loves God, wishes to see him loved by all.

Secondly, we must show charity towards the sick, who are in greater

need of help. Let us make them some little present, if they are poor.

At least let us go and wait on them and comfort them, even though they

should not thank us for doing so; the Lord will reward us.

Thirdly, we must above all show charity to our enemies. Some are all

kindness with their friends; but Jesus Christ says, "Do good to those

that hate you." (Matt. v. 44) By this you may know that a man is a

true Christian, if he seeks to do good to those who wish him evil..

And if we can do nothing else for those who persecute us, let us at

least pray that God will prosper them, according as Jesus commands

us: "Pray for them that persecute you." (Matt, v. 44) This is the way

the saints revenged themselves. He who pardons anyone who has offended

him, is sure of being pardoned by God; since God has given us the

promise: "Forgive, and you shall be forgiven." (Luke, vi. 37) Our

Lord said one day to the Blessed Angela of Foligno, that the surest

sign of a soul being loved by God, is when it loves a person who has

offended it.

Fourthly, let us also be charitable to our neighbors who are dead,

that is, to the holy souls in purgatory. St.. Thomas says, that if we

are bound to help our neighbors who are alive, we are also bound to

remember them when dead. Those holy prisoners are suffering pains

which exceed all the sufferings of this life; and nevertheless are in

the greatest necessity, since they cannot possibly help themselves. A

Cistercian monk once said to the sacristan of his monastery: "Help

me, brother, by your prayers, when I can no longer help myself." Let

us then endeavor to succor these holy souls either by having Masses

said for them, or by hearing Masses for them, by giving alms, or at

least by praying and applying indulgences in their behalf; they will

show themselves grateful by obtaining great graces for us, not only

when they reach heaven, if they arrive there sooner through our

prayers, but also in purgatory.